I wrote the other day about having time alone for me and my husband but I didn't talk much about time together. I thought I'd share a bit.
I have to confess I hate when people say the secret to a happy marriage is a regular date night. I hate it because being a single income family with many little ones the money just isn't there. Yes, you choose what you spend your money on and we choose to spend it on other things we want more than a "date night". We have family around but no one who wanted to volunteer on a regular basis to watch our kids. We tried a swap with friends and it just didn't always work out. We were not willing to fork over $50-$100 to pay for a sitter and to go out to a movie or dinner. And to be honest I wasn't big on leaving my kids with someone else. Then we realized we were killing ourselves to get out and do something someone else told us "should be" important to us!
We are both homebodies really. We like to snuggle up on our own couch at night and watch a show or a movie. We do like to go out to eat sometimes but we are just as happy going and picking it up and bringing it home to eat. So that became our "date night". After the kids are tucked in we'll rent a movie and pick up a meal or even just a snack. Our corner store I swear stays in business from our late night runs for a pop and beef jerky or ice cream or something along those lines. We don't have an official night or even call it a date night, we just do it. Sometimes there will be a movie on TV or on demand we'll do. We don't always do a meal or treat but when we do it feels "official"! Ha!
Now lest you think we are the most boring people in the world, we do have other things we do together! We live where the snow flies and it is down right cold from November through March. Those are our movie date times. Once the warm weather hits we LOVE to cycle!!! We take the whole family to trails often but our most fun is heading out on our own (or with only one child to pull behind us) and ride off into the sunset... or sunrise! This summer we rode a 40 mile covered bridge bike tour for our anniversary! It was the best. This coming year we hope to train together and ride at least one if not more "century rides" (100 miles). In the warm weather we do have regular days we go out just us. Once a week we meet some of my husbands buddies from work to ride local trails and every other Saturday we meet a group in the morning to ride. The weekday is a pretty short ride and we swap grandparents. One week my parents will watch them for a couple hours and the next week his mom will. On Saturdays we bring the baby and the older kids can hold down the fort while we're gone. The neighbors are home and without a little one around they handle themselves quite well (ahhh, the joys of having a real "big" in the big kid group!!). I love the winter but I have to say I sure do miss cycling already! I should add that when it's warm and we ride we do not still do the time alone day. Cards are not played and girlfriend time is set aside to ride together.
We also like to play boardgames together and the occasional video game! I am a master at Tetris! I tell him I get my skills from arranging everything in our refrigerator on grocery day! I don't do all that well at "boy" games like war and speeding but every once in awhile I'll give it a try.
So there you have it. How we spend husband and wife time together. How do you spend your time? Are you overlooking something simple and fun you love to do because you feel you "have" to have a "date night"?